The Red Velvet Oreo Taste Test (Photos: Candace Braun Davison)

What Red Velvet Oreos Really Taste Like

For months, it seemed like the unicorn of the Internet: People had Photoshopped Oreo bags, tempting us all with the fervent hope that one day, Red Velvet Oreos would come to the shelves of the Publixes, Piggly Wigglys and Key Foods we frequent.

That day has come.

Or rather, that day is Feb. 2nd.

Red Velvet Oreos will hit stores on Groundhog Day, but you can sign up to receive an early sample here. We were lucky enough to snag a few sandwich cookies to try, and if you’re not sure whether they’re worth the $4.49 price tag, we took it upon ourselves to chronicle the Oreo-eating experience. You know, for you. And science.

The Red Velvet Oreo Taste Test (Photos: Candace Braun Davison)
What the cookies really look like, without the magic of an Instagram filter. (Photos: Candace Braun Davison)

The Sight: A joy to behold, like gazing upon your firstborn or a basketful of yawning kittens. Some may say that’s hyperbolic. I wouldn’t necessarily disagree. But still, props for creating a red cookie that resembles red velvet but isn’t so psychadelically bright that I have to stop and question what I’m actually ingesting. Because that kind of kills the carb-loading mood.

The Smell: Sweet, with a faint whiff of cream cheese frosting. Any girl who once had a vanilla Lip Smackers roll-on lip gloss will recognize this quasi-chemically-yet-delightful scent right away. Ah, memories.

The Texture: Crunchier than expected. Have Oreos always been this rock hard?! Are our teeth just getting old and soft, the result of years of mainlining desserts?

The Taste: The cookie itself tastes a lot like a classic Oreo—vaguely chocolatey—which is in line with red velvet itself. It’s a chocolate-lite cake, with a little cocoa flavor. Really, though, this cookie — like the cake — is a vehicle for the frosting (er, creme filling). The filling is a bit of a compromise for Team Vanilla Buttercream versus Team Cream Cheese. When it comes to red velvet, people bicker on which flavor is the proper frosting, though cream cheese typically wins out. And it does here too. The creme filling has a slight tanginess to it, like cream cheese frosting, but it’s much sweeter than the frosting you know and love (a nod to you, Buttercream fans).

The Verdict: Worth trying. We could totally see ourselves making 4-ingredient truffles for Valentine’s Day with these. (The cream cheese would be a welcome boost to offset all the sweetness.)
Like all Oreos though, each bite is better after dunked in a glass of ice-cold milk.

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